Letter To Self

This is the letter I wrote to myself as an assignment for my pre-departure course through CCA. Look for a response to it after I return from Mexico and adjust back into my life here in South Dakota.

 

Dear Lydia:

            Can you believe I will be leaving for México in just over five weeks? When I decided back in November that I was going to do this, May felt like forever away. The time has flown, and now I am finishing my semester at school and preparing to leave for my four weeks in Mérida.

            When I decided to study in México this summer, I had two main goals in mind: to finish my Spanish minor with the six credits I will earn there, and to gain fluency speaking by living with a family there. My Spanish teacher was the first to tell me about the program, and she encouraged me to pursue this opportunity further. She was so excited when I told her I had decided to apply. For a time, I was only excited because she told me I should be excited. Then when I was accepted in January, I realized that I really was going to go to México, even though May still seemed a long ways off. I really had no idea of what the program was going to be like, but I was starting to get excited about the adventure of it.

            When I think back over the last months, I can see myself growing more and more excited. In March, I got the opportunity to meet and speak with Val, the director of the program in Mérida. We also started an online pre-departure course through CCA, which allowed us to explore our feelings about traveling to another country to learn about the culture there. Val led a group session at CCA, which I watched online. She shared some tips about packing and some advice about the culture and what to expect of the weather, the schedule, and the classes. Suddenly everything was starting to become real to me.

            Last week, I read some of the articles on the CCA blog from students who have studied in Mérida for a semester or more. The stories they shared were incredible! They had so many adventures, and they all grew so much from the experience of living another culture and lifestyle for four or six months. One of the blog entries really struck me. On February 2, 2012, Cynthia wrote,

I should have expected it to be different.  I knew it was going to be different.  And yet I was so surprised that it was different.  Will I ever learn?  Sometimes our strong points can blind us to reality.”

I think this will be the closest to what I will experience when I arrive in México. I have read dozens of articles and looked through dozens of web pages about Mérida and the Yucatán. I know that it will be much different than South Dakota. And yet I expect that I will be shocked by the differences.

            I cannot really say I am apprehensive about this trip. I am an adventuresome, independent girl, used to doing things on my own and taking care of myself. It will be hard being away from my family for four weeks—my longest separation from them has been two weeks. But we will Skype, and I know I will be so busy that the four weeks will fly by. Before I know it, I will be back in the States, and México will be a memory. Sometimes I wonder if I will like my host family, but I know that all of the host families must be wonderful people, if they do not mind opening their home to a complete stranger for four weeks every summer. Honestly, I have never met someone I cannot get along with...

            I am excited to meet the other students studying in Mérida with me and Jasmin. We have had some interesting chats on the discussion board already, and I am sure it will be an interesting group when we are all together! I wonder if we will keep in touch after we leave México. I am guessing that we will. Four weeks together can turn strangers into friends.

            The closer the date gets, the more I realize that my two original goals were not deep enough. Now I want to go to Mérida to experience the culture. I know that is a clichéd reason for studying abroad, and I have used it as a cliché until now. Now I want to see another way of life, and become part of it for a time. I experience different cultures when I visit my family in Michigan and Canada; the differences are wider than some might expect. But to experience another culture while speaking another language will be something new all over again.

            I am certain there is still a lot to learn. When I return from México, I will read this letter, and I will be amazed at how much I do NOT know now. But one thing I do know—I am ready to learn. I am ready to step outside of my comfort zone. I am ready to have my views of myself and my life challenged and even changed. I am ready.

            ¡Hasta luego!

Lydia